'Grief in Bloom' - Watering self love and forgiveness.
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| "Grief in Bloom" in a mock-up design 118cm X 84cm crylic on Canvas Unframed |
Grief in Bloom - A testament that we can make something great, out of grief, sorrow, sadness and emotional guilt.
This is the second addition to my new series: Beautiful Depression. Beautiful depression is a series that talks to mental health in isolation of other influences and factors, because like many of us suffering from mental health, the feeling of isolation and loneliness almost becomes friends and a comfort, more than an enemy.
I decided on the series beautiful depression, because of my own personal story. I experienced tremendous trauma a little over 2 years ago, with the passing of my beloved Mama, and as a result became friends with my demons, instead of getting the necessary help.
This one-of-a-kind artwork, carries words that I can’t speak, and feelings that I can’t explain. The significant factor about this piece, was the choice to make use of a polaroid reference, for many reasons:
First and foremost – mental health doesn’t choose a certain gender, or tradition. It doesn’t oversee color or status. It’s by far in my opinion the most dangerous of all illnesses, factually because it cannot be seen, or touched or be picked up on a scan. It’s a spectrum of a legion of emotions and thoughts, that makes us ultimately our own worst enemy.
On closer inspection, the figure is one female profile, separated into different polaroid picture references, and colors. My decision to go more abstract, and with influences of cubism and surrealism, forms part of the over-arching topic. Depression. You can be the best version of yourself today, yet tomorrow, you don’t want to get out of bed. Different levels of depression and mental diseases. Different colors – sometimes more than one, in a single day.
Secondly
– the bold colors and heavy brush strokes:
a.
I
tend to lean to more monochrome colors, purely because of artistic preference,
aiming to invoke the viewers own emotions, instead of leading the viewers emotions
with bold colors. Yet, my decision to make use of bold colors for this
series, is not to be misrepresented for a “wow” factor. It’s indeed bold,
colorful and a motion of colors mixed into layers, to support the symbolism
of the different moods, feelings, emotions, thoughts etc. that depression can
cause. In contrast to the symbolism of the afore-mentioned, the bold colours on
the opposite side, shows again beauty and flair. Finesse and certainly an
attention magnet. My message however is what is of utmost importance.
b.
The
heavy brushstrokes refer to the proverbial weight of the world, that we carry
on our shoulders. It’s harsh, it’s heavy, it’s visible… much like when you see
a friend or a co worker that seems to be “down” or “off” on a particular day. Sometimes,
we as humans can perhaps pick up on the vibe of the other person in terms of
the weight they carry – but most importantly, is to realize that it’s
predominantly projection. We don’t realize how or when we project our own
feelings, emotions and weight of the world to rather see it within another,
than confronting ourselves.
The
colorful lines of paint running down the artwork at the bottom are for 2
reasons, apart from tying in with the artwork’s aesthetic, it is a reminder of
all the tears shed and the tears still to come. My beloved mother always used
to say “let the tears cleanse the soul”. And in most cases, it is true. A good
cry on a bad day, may perhaps be a stepping stone again for the next day. Yet
again – tears of all colors of all corners of the world. Depression has no preference.
It takes and overwhelms whoever it wants to.
My choice for the OCHRE fade background color is to emphasize the stark contrasting colors and different dimensions that I wanted to achieve.
Noticeably some of the mouths on some of the polaroid's are almost not visible… this metaphoric intention, is to remind the viewer and beholder that it’s not always as easy as everyone thinks to talk. To talk about feelings, to talk about terrible experiences, to talk about terrible pasts and circumstances. Current society and “societal norms” dictates that “It’s all in the head. It’s mind over matter”. The irony IS JUST THAT – it’s indeed all in the mind, however we’re still but just human, and fall short to stay strong and keep mind over matter. When we bend or break… it becomes matter over mind – and once you’ve slipped on that banana peel… falling is imminent.
The eyes. The “I”s have it! I’ve chosen to keep some of the eyes – and all visible eyes are open with intent. I want to challenge the viewer or beholder with the eyes. Do you really see what you think you see? Or do you see what you want to see and make yourself think, that you see indeed what you think you see. See? I know, confusing… but a strong effect, and I hope this resonates and touches the souls who will lay eyes on this artwork.
Of course… the flower symbolizes the beautiful cosmos flower – for its fragility, it’s poise, it’s beauty… it’s undeniable resilience to grow wherever it’s planted. It’s a symbol of strength. Of light at the end of the tunnel. A symbol of hope and a symbol of determination. Once your fields are invested with cosmos flowers, you’ll never get them away again. They grow back in multiplication and stronger than before. It’s also referred to as a “wild flower” purely because of the reference that the cosmos flower only grows in the “wild”. Yet… if you think you want to pick a couple of these beauties to freshen up your home with its splendour and beauty – think again. This resilient, strong growing wild flower, is unfortunately the most fragile when it’s not rooted into the ground. They die quicker than any other average flower… some don’t last even for a couple of hours – a stark contrast that it can bloom beautifully in the harshest of fields and circumstances, however surrenders to the power that picked them. A resemblance of grief.
This artwork has been anointed, if you will, and is called “Grief in Bloom”. My grief… my past – is now something that I have gained the courage to use, to turn into power and create something of value and distinct references, and to share those with the world. The name should also lead you as the viewer, to your own self and hopefully you realize that if you carry the weight of the world on your shoulders, if you are tired, if you want to give up, if you want to misuse and abuse alcohol and other substances like I did, if you can’t carry on anymore, but you still show up… Then that should be the “clicking” moment to realize – that somewhere, somehow, there will be beauty again. Even if you don’t know how or when. But through your own inner courage that you will find once you’ve realized that you’re not done yet – will be the moment that you too can choose the beauty, by virtue through benevolence and dedication. And with Virtue from The Heavens.
There are currently 3 offers on this artwork – I am holding it back for press and social media awareness – but if you see this and want to make an offer – be my guest. Proceeds of the sale is reserved for The Lady Isabel Foundation.
My hope for you is to find your way to blossom and bloom!
